Balanced Melting Pot

Is there room for improvement?

In Cultural Expectations, Culture, Parenting, Questions, Thoughts on March 30, 2009 at 9:53 am

I watched Spanglish for the fifteenth time this weekend, and the end of the movie sparked a thought that I’ve been having for a while about my expectations for my children. For those of you who have not seen, the daughter, who is narrating her college admission essay, says that while acceptance to the university would mean a great deal to her it would not change who she was; her mother’s daughter. 

We often hear that we are supposed to want our children to “do better” than we did. For my mother, who had to drop out of school at 17 to support her family, I can completely understand where that desire comes from for us. However, I feel that I have been successful in both what my mother wanted for us, as well as in terms of goals that I set for myself.

So, is it fair to expect my children to do better than me? What would that entail? Getting farther in their education, making more money, etc? Can I just hope that they be happier than me?

I admit that I have worked hard for everything that I have and continue to do so. But, I also think that is why I appreciate my life so much. Without my struggles, how would I know that life could be a lot worse?

Am I making sense? What are your thoughts about the expectations of success for [your] children?

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