Balanced Melting Pot

Archive for the ‘Immigrant Students’ Category

Get out your measuring sticks!

In Cultural Expectations, Education, Immigrant Families, Immigrant Students, Parenting, Questions, Self Image, Traditions on November 29, 2009 at 11:59 pm

image Maybe I’m getting old, but lately I’ve been thinking a lot about where I am in my life – if that even makes sense.

So, here I am about to move for  the 4th time since becoming an adult and I’m trying to figure out if I consider myself to be successful. I know that this judgment is relative to a person’s culture and experiences and only I can really know the answer, but I can’t help but to think of what my family (and friends) may have expected from me. I wrote a while ago about cultural expectations for career choices and I think that’s where this all starts.

My mom always pushed us to go far in school. Very early on she made it clear that she expected my sister and I to at least finish college. Check, so +1

Then, I made the choice to get married and start a family soon after graduating college. –1

But, then I went back to school and obtained my masters’. +1

However, I am still trying to decide what I want to do for the rest of my life. –1

Even without my very expensive education 😉 , I would know that this complex equation adds up to 0. Let me also add that I know that my friends and family are extremely proud of me – it’s the successful part that make me wonder…

One thing I know for sure is that I am happy and I wouldn’t have things any other way. I just don’t want my type A personality to look back one day and wonder if I really made use of all my talents… 😥

How do you (or your culture) measure success?

 Subscribe in a reader

Subscribe to Balanced Melting Pot by Email

Balanced Melting Pot on Facebook


Things I wish I’d known…

In Culture, Immigrant Students, Questions, Race Relations, Thoughts on December 8, 2008 at 9:22 pm

I am an avid reader of a website called Anti-Racist Parent and a while ago there was an article published providing tips for a student of color while attending a university that is not ethnically diverse. There a many great tips and I’ll let you read the article for yourself, but I wanted to talk about two of them which I wish I was given as far back as high school.


You can speak any language you damn well please, any time you please.


Wow! This statement is powerful in many ways. Simple and straightforward. Growing up, I was actually ashamed that I spoke another language. For the longest time, I would only answer my family members in English, just in case a friend heard. At that time, it was very uncool to be bilingual. I think many immigrants still hesitate to speak their native tongue when they think someone who cannot understand is in earshot. I have come across many Haitians who simply refuse to speak Haitian Creole; even when they know the Haitian they are speaking to cannot understand English.


You are not the spokesperson for your ethnicity.

This one I am ambivalent about. I agree that no one person can fully represent an entire culture and this is simply leads to stereotypes. But, I have heard (more times than I care to count) that I don’t look, talk, or seem like a Haitian. This leads me to believe that there is a misconception that Haitians look, talk or seem a certain way – all of them. So, I don’t know if it’s good that I sometimes felt that I could help eliminate those stereotypes by representing all Haitians, or if those people were going to stay ignorant regardless. In any case, I think it pushed me to set my goals and standards a little higher, which can’t hurt, right?


So, please share your thoughts on this article. Do they make you wish there was a handbook for minority students or do you think these issues are non-existent?

Subscribe in a reader

Subscribe to Balanced Melting Pot by Email

free hit counters